The opening minutes of Onimusha: Way of the Sword are glorious, in the sense that they’re utterly shambolic. Wandering ronin Musashi wakes up under a bridge, belts a wrong-footingly British "WOT?!" at some starving urchins eyeing up his rice ball, then proceeds to be chased around a muddy village by what feels like two thousand martial arts students, only occasionally stopping to boot a wooden plank into their faces or scoop up an imperilled dog. It’s goofy and brash and genuinely funny, in a way that immediately looks to elevate it among the field of po-faced fantasy slashers as effectively as any well-honed parry mechanic.

Why in the following hours, then, does Way of the Sword make only occasional attempts to match this intro’s energy?

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